jokes humorous- jokes

**Ten to twelve, it's time to eat.
A man enters a restaurant, the server instead has a table and asked him to wait. Beside him a man reading a newspaper at the table in front of an appetizing plate of spaghetti.
Our client really hungry and after a few minutes it can no longer: he quietly pulls the base of his neighbor and starts eating.
Reached the end of his meal, he sees the bottom of a plate full of greasy comb dandruff, disgusting ... and he vomits his spaghetti on the plate. At that time, his neighbor folds his newspaper and said, "You also have found the comb ..."

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**A cat enters a pharmacy application:
Can I have the syrup cat.

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**A young man tells his mother he is in love and wants to marry. With a smile, he said:
- I asked my sweetheart and her two friends tomorrow afternoon tea at home. I will not tell you, and you will try to guess which of the three I decided to marry her!
The mother agrees.
The next day, he returned with three pretty girls. They go to the salon, talk a while, and finally the young man asks his mother:
- So mom, in your opinion, who do you think I intend to marry?
- The middle.
- Wow, that's great, you guessed it! How did you do?
- Simple intuition, she already gets on my nerves ...

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**Two guys are talking and one of them said:
- If the end of the world came in fifteen minutes what would you do?
- Me? I'll fuck anything that moves! And you?
- I'm not moving ...

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**Read the following carefully aloud

- This is this cat.
- This is is cat.
- This is a cat.
- This is how cat.
- This is a cat.
- This is keep cat.
- This is a cat.
- This is con cat.
- This is busy cat.
- This is for cat.
- This is the cat.
- This is less cat.
- This is 20 cat.
- This is seconds cat.

Now you're wondering what this stupid, huh? Well go back and read the third word in each line from the beginning ... No hard feelings ...

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**Two women discuss:
- I am an excellent guardian of home whenever I divorce, it's me who keeps the house!

**This is a man who is tied to a pole in a cannibaliste tribe.
A cannibal approaches and asks:
- What is your name?
Then the man replied:
- Why are you asking me that?
The cannibal replied:
- This is the menu!